The last picture I have of Roberta is of her sitting next to Mom on the bed, drinking tea and making comments on Wheel of Fortune. Mom was in her final days of cancer and unresponsive, but Roberta just kept talking and loving on her just the same. What a beautiful picture of true friendship. Of course a friend like that isn't made overnight. Theirs was started as young married women in a Sunday School class and was forged through childbirth, heartaches, trips and activities, hours of chats over cups of tea, and countless phone conversations. They were a rather unlikely pair - Roberta was laid back and slow-moving, while Mom was quick and decisive. Roberta loved lingering while Mom was methodical...and that made for a few minor bumps in the road, mostly due to those differences in personality, but there was never a single thought of abandoning their bond. They instinctively lived by the quote that says, "We lived in a time when if something was broken you fixed it, rather than replacing it." They were heart sisters.
The beauty of true friendship has been expressed so eloquently through the years but I have always loved the Bible's definition...Proverbs 17:17 says "A friend loves at all times and is born, as a brother, for times of adversity." True friends are there. That's all. It doesn't matter what circumstances or situations are occurring, whether there it's a time of feasting or famine. It can be a time filled with joy and celebration or sorrow and deep anguish. The true friend doesn't moralize, judge, critique, or rationalize...a true friend knows there will be time for "many words" later. They are just there...with love, support, comfort, and maybe chocolate chip cookies! They don't always know an answer and don't try to find one. They know that hugs in silence and a loving hand to hold are sometimes the only things necessary. Reciprocation is never thought about either because both of them know in their hearts that on another day the switch will come! Life is just like that!
The classic passage in John 15:13 really says it all..."No one has or shows greater & stronger affection than this, to lay down and give up his own life for that of his friend's." Though you mostly hear this verse quoted in relation to the ultimate sacrifice, the million little sacrifices made in the name of friendship are a reality as well. True friends lay aside their rights, needs, wants, & desires if necessary in order to be there for a friend. Sometimes it means rearranging life for an hour, a day, or a season in order to come along side...it's not easy and can be very inconvenient, but there is nothing that's too great a burden or sacrifice because the underlying love demands nothing less.
Both of my parents were blessed with that type of friends, and in their final days the comfort they received was irreplaceable. Roberta is now in her final stages and although the friends that would be there with her have all gone on ahead, I know that in her heart she feels their comfort because she knows they're waiting, watching, and anticipating that happy day when she will reunite with them and their circle of true friends will again be complete,... but this time they will be together for all eternity!!
I am blessed to have my own circle of friends like that...and I hope you do too! This side of heaven, it's one of God's greatest gifts!!
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